Where Is This Going?

One of the most infuriating things in life is not knowing where you stand with someone. Whether it’s someone you like, friend or even family. As far as they are concerned they don’t really see where you’re coming from or that they may be just as confused as you are, adding unnecessary stress and a growing frustration towards that person. You also don’t want to bring it up because you always feel that you bring the issue up first or that it is way easier to just bitch about it to friends and never really sit down and talk it out, a talent in which we all seem to have and be relatively good at.

The current trend is the topic of relationships. Also known as the ‘more than friends less than a relationship’ phase. The phase even your friends get stressed about when you talk bring up the subject. I know, it will never be easy to talk about feelings because it’s scary and serious and who wants to be scared and serious? A few days or a couple of weeks is fine to just blatantly flirt and just mess around with each other, it is when you finally feel the effect of cupids arrow that you actually like this person and are mad crushing on them. Feelings and emotions are perfect ingredients to throw into the pot of what-the-hell-is-happening?! This is especially the case when you can both sense that you have a crush on each other but don’t admit it and then it becomes a prolonged issue that it actually weighs you down after a while.

The one big fat no-no about the entire thing is when they act like total assholes and just mess you around because one, they may not actually like you the same way back and are having a deep self-flattery session with the fact that someone, or in some cases, many ‘ones’ like them at the same time. I don’t know if acting like an asshole will eventually land them the girl/boy, perhaps for the short-term but if they can’t be straight up with you from the beginning, how the hell are you going to communicate with each other honestly in the future? It could also be because that they just love having the choice, it makes them feel more powerful, though they are just confusing it with egotistical. It’s nice to feel liked but feelings can change without you even having the slightest clue that it would happen. Don’t take people’s feelings for granted because even though it might not occur to them for the longest time that you are dragging them along for a ride without a purpose or intention, but once it does, sayonara asshole. you’ve just lost a really decent person, or haven’t you noticed because you are just doing the same thing person after person?

Two, they like you back but are scared of taking it to the next level because of past experiences and they “suck at telling people how they feel”. This is one hundred percent understandable. At some point in life we will all experience a heartbreak, whether you are they dumper or the dumpee. It makes you open your eyes to what you really want out of life and your priorities at the given time. We really shouldn’t compare our ex’s to our current crush because they are two different people and you ex is your ex for a reason. But for some reason, before that leap of faith and officially announcing your feelings to that person, your mind decides to bring up every bad relationship experience from your past at the same time. Perhaps you/the other person isn’t totally ready for anything serious just yet. Question is, is anyone ever ready? If you ever have one of those moments where you ponder about life and you can imagine yourself with that person doing all the sweet couple-y stuff and prepared to put effort to make it work despite several factors whether it be distance, job, money or family, then you are most likely ready to make it happen. Fingers crossed they like you back too.

Three, they don’t really know you that well yet and might want to start out as friends first and see if feelings develop. Talk about friend-zoned. It isn’t really that much less annoying when the other person is constantly ‘scared’ because we all are! I know someone eventually has to break the (sexual) tension but sheesh, are you always going to be the one waiting? Then you go all CSI with texts and try and analyze the ‘signs’ that they may consciously or unconsciously give you when you hang out. Basically, things can get really complicated really quickly. It’s ridiculously tempting to just board the ship known as “relation” because it is fun and exciting. After several encounters with people, some of which will be bitches and assholes, you realize that you really do need to get to know the person first before anything is made official. It becomes more than just knowing their hobbies, likes and dislikes. That’s just a general tick for each category. Can they make you laugh? Do you every just have a moment where you look at them and go “man, I am really lucky to have you” and just stare into their awesomeness of existence? Little things always go a long way and it’s those that we never forget, even with our past relationships.

The bottom line is that sometimes we just have to swallow our pride or face our fear because you never know what you will be missing if you just sit on the sidelines forever. Sometimes you may not even realize that you are leading someone on and giving each other mixed signals because you haven’t been communicating as well as you should have been. You’ll get a gut feeling if you think the person is leading you on for shits and giggles or if they aren’t sure how to express themselves to you. Apparently people tell you to go with your gut instinct…so go for it!

People will forget what you said. People will forget what you did. But people will never forget how you made them feel – Maya Angelou

 

 

 

 

When You’re The Only Person Your Age at A Party

Remember the days where you were pretty much given no choice but to attend the parties your parents were invited to because you were too young to be left alone in the house or that saying “no” had absolutely no effect because you say no to everything your parents say anyway? In reality, we were invited to parties to witness parents get drunk, talk loudly and make innuendos out of everything. The only thing that saves you from jumping off a cliff is the food and drinks, even if it’s just downing pints of water and chomping on salted chips. Anything but to expose my eyes and ears to such a cringe fest.

You also don’t want to socialize with all the tiny ones, aka people ‘who are like, 12’ because they are replaying all the crap songs on youtube and writing comments on facebook. What the hell happened to running around in the park, playing cards and connecting the damn dots?! We were cooler kids back then. By back then I mean the nineties. You then get your parents’ friends who ask about your job, school…that’s about it really. A brief five-minute rundown of what is happening in my life and then there isn’t anything left to talk about. Please don’t ask go into awkward territory and ask if I am in a relationship, I don’t even know you.

The only thing that keeps me sane throughout the night is my phone. I can text people I don’t even really talk to on a regular basis because I am that bored and pretend to be interested in knowing their latest updates in life, perhaps pry into their love life whether it exists or not. I won’t even think twice to text all my closer friends and have the usual “hi, sup? Nothing much, you?” type of conversation where it pretty much dies after the brief exchange of words, then think of the most random topic just to keep the conversation going. For all I know I could be interrupting their social gathering with their zillions of friends while I am happily and thankfully stuck with parents and kids.

The night finally ends at 3am where the kids are on the verge of dropping dead of tiredness yet at the same time full of energy because it was so cool to stay up hours after bedtime. On the other side of the spectrum you have drunken parents who still don’t want the night to be over because the next day it’s back to being a parent again and savoring each second of being able to let loose. As for me, I had front row seats to witnessing the transition of sober to tipsy to just plain gone. It’s like I stepped into a high-school reunion minus the facebook pictures posted the next day. The one good thing about the party is the music because their generation had better quality songs and remain as classic tunes to-date compared to a lot of the stuff we hear on the radio – fact.

It’s Not Okay To…

It’s not okay to send me a facebook message asking me to like your page for your benefit, especially if we don’t talk in real life/ever. How are we even ‘friends’?

It’s not okay to block certain URL’s at work, especially if I am bored out of my mind with absolutely nothing to do

It’s not okay when I ask you to close the door to my room and you leave it ajar

It’s not okay to say that you did really badly when you got 38 out of 40 on your test and everyone else got below 30

It’s not okay to ask something more than once by rewording your question when I calmly said ‘no’ the first time

It’s not okay to keep checking your phone and texting in the cinema, I don’t need the brightness of the sun in my eyes

It’s not okay to point your finger at me and ask me to do something. What am I? Your bitch?

It’s not okay to use gym equipment and not wipe it after you’re done. Tip: wipe anything that requires you to put your sweaty hands, back and ass on.

It’s not okay to chew with your mouth open. EVER.

It’s not okay to wear next to nothing on a night out in winter and then endlessly complain that you feel cold. I wonder why. Absolutely baffling.

It’s not okay to pick your nose right where everyone can see you, especially when your finger is so far up you’re practically picking your brain.

It’s not okay to do duck faces in pictures and it’s never ever okay to do duck faces in pictures taken in the toilet

It’s not okay to leave your dirty dishes in the sink overnight after claiming you’d clean it the next day and when the next day comes, they are still there

It’s not okay when you make out with another girl just to get attention from guys. Why don’t you just suck on it? That should get you attention

It’s not okay to be a One Direction fan, Justin Bieber fan, anyone-from-disney-except-Demi fan at one time or even just one of them

It’s not okay to claim you “really like” a certain band, even though we both know you haven’t heard of them

It’s not okay for me to text you and you reply a million hours later with a one-word answer. I am not going to talk to you anymore for a very long time

It’s not okay to put your bag on the empty seta next to you on crowded public transport/restaurants

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Hi, I Work with You…Do I Know You?

Ever since we were kids, we constantly had to make new friends every time we changed schools from primary, secondary and college/university. We all started as newbies and then had to find people we clicked with and they ultimately became our friends. As we get older, having a few close friends became more important than having hundreds of acquaintances because we’ve shared our private lives with those closest to us and most likely count on those friends for both good and bad moments.

However, once you start work, whether it be an internship, part-time or full-time job, the dynamics seem to change a lot, especially if you are the newbie. It almost feel like you are intruding in some way because of the glares and stares even though a majority of people in the office are tolerable. Everyone has their office gossip and knows whos getting married, inside jokes about one another or how their trip to some tropical paradise went. Your boss introduces you to each member of the team as you shake hands, smile and forget their name and role within the company almost instantly. Standard procedure, but you feel a bit more comfortable having at least one very brief exchange of words, even though you may never speak to them ever again.

A few days become weeks where you have settled in quite well and make brief remarks on peoples’ random chit chat, listen to several unfortunate experiences or read out ridiculous emails in a sarcastic tone – basically small talk. But small talk is great in an office environment because who wants to work in complete silence all day everyday? Aside from that, it’s actually quite difficult to get to know personal details about a person unless you eat with them for lunch or they approach you with a question first. Finding out via hot gossip and eavesdropping is another interesting way of course. I guess it’s always the ‘challenge’ at the start to mingle and try to make your mark in a new work environment, whether you pretend to be someone you’re not. By pretending I mean being more social and talkative than you’re used to in order to seem more interesting and meet new people. Or you could just be you and feel the vibes from certain people that you think you will click with.

With that being said, you go into work day after day after day but you realize that you don’t actually ‘know’ who you work with. You see each other everyday for about 9 hours or so, do some work, go home with the usual “see you tomorrow” or “have a great weekend”, nothing substantial, out of courtesy I suppose. I am actually interested in finding out what people are going to be doing during the weekend and then asking about how it went, not because I am nosy, but I made the effort and they responded back with an answer longer than a couple of words and made a brief connection. However, I’ve never been in a situation where I would call/text colleagues to hang out outside of work and just treated them like I would with any friend – lunch, coffee, shopping, drinks maybe even a movie…or a one night stand! Kidding.

I don’t really know what it would take to get to know a colleague to be more than just someone you see at work. Not that I am desperate for new friends but because that person would bring a nice change to the group of friends you already have. You also don’t want to be too eager beaver to the point where that someone thinks you have a crush on them, straight or gay. But then again they might just say the latter because for a mini self-flattery session.

Anyway! I think the most important thing at the beginning is to try and feel as comfortable as you can within the team and it always helps if your colleagues are there to support you and ‘answer any questions you may have’ even if you know they are just being polite to your face because you have to, not like you will be spending quality time together any time soon. It just takes time before you realize that people know more things about you than you actually thought.

 

 

 

 

 

 

Channel your Inner Child and Re-Live Classic Pixar Tunes

Pixar is possibly the most recognized animation film companies and instantly rings familiar bell across all age groups. With blockbuster films including Finding Nemo, Cars, Ratatouille, The Incredbles, Up, Monsters Inc, Wall-E, Toy Story and the most recent Brave, it is clear that Pixar continues to entertain movie goers and have a line-up of films in the works.

The intricate and spectacular visual experience is paired with music to treat your ears and this is what the Hong Kong Philharmonic Orchestra and conductor Nicholas Buc aims to achieve at the end of their two day “Pixar in Concert” performances on Thursday 22 November and Friday 23 November 2012.  Hum along to your favorite themes and see if you can pinpoint the film and scene the music is from, Now that is a true Pixar fan.

We can all thank the several established composers including Michael Giacchino, Randy Newman, Patrick Doyle and Thomas Newman, who came up with the catchy, memorable themes, some of which have been nominated and won awards for their memorable works. Perhaps it is because they were able to catch the mood and tone of the movie so effectively it almost seemed to enhance every emotion you felt. The Ups were higher and the downs were lower. You were definitely not alone when your eyes got watery and had to hold back your tears as much as you could in Toy Story 3, Nemo, Up or Monsters Inc.

The concert is sure to be both fun and moving for all members of the family and you might even leave the hall a bigger Pixar fan than before.

The concert will be held at the Hong Kong Cultural Centre commencing at 8pm on both nights.

Tickets can be purchased at Urbtix outlets or online at www.urbtix.hk

For more information on upcoming concerts visit the orchestra’s official website at www.hkphil.org

Swire Symphony Under The Stars

The Hong Kong Philharmonic Orchestra and conductor Perry So invites you to the spectacular annual concert “Swire Symphony Under The Stars” on Friday 9 November 2012.  What better place to hold the concert other than the outdoor New Central Harbourfront which overlooks the famous skyline of Hong Kong where you will be completely surrounded by the city’s bright lights and urban sounds. The concert promises to be a memorable and atypical from your usual classical concert.

With a program that essentially covers most musical periods, the night brings you pieces from Handel, Mozart, Mendelssohn, Smetana and Rimsky-Korsakov. The orchestra will then jazz up your night with numbers from American greats such as Bernstein, Gershwin and Adams, an exciting and modern spin to the evening. In other words, there is something for everyone.

If you are feeling extra musical, the orchestra is inviting you to bring along your own instruments and participate in Mozart’s Toy Symphony. Regardless of your grade, ability and age, the performance is sure to get everyone involved and interacting with one another.

The concert starts at 7:30pm but gates will open from 5:30pm onwards so be sure to get there early for a decent view of the stage.

Free tickets can be picked up from Tom Lee outlets upon submitting a brief form. Children under the age of 3 go free.

For further enquiries call +852 2721 2030

To find out about future concert dates visit the orchestra’s official page at http://www.hkphil.org/

 

Annual Arts and Music Festival “Clockenflap” Returns

Music, film, art and food (aka the best things in life) come together in the annual two-day festival known as Clockenflap. Events are held throughout various locations in Hong Kong with the aim to focus on the contemporary arts scene in the city, giving exposure to both established and up-coming local and international talents. This year, the festival being held at one of the most spectacular locations yet – West Kowloon Waterfront Promenade. If you are local to Hong Kong, you will know what I mean. The backdrop of the famous skyline, particularly at night, is definitely a treat for your eyes and if you haven’t been visited the area, spend a few hours during the weekend to escape from the hustle and bustle of the city.

Founded by Jay Forester, Justin Sweeting and Mike Hill in 2008, their vision from right from the start was to establish Hong Kong as an international arts hub. Think Glastonbury, Itunes Festival and South by Southwest but with a heavy touch of multi-media. Now in it’s fifth year, the festival has only increased in popularity with each passing year and continues to attracts a variety of audiences passionate about everything to do with the arts.

If you are a film buff, be sure to check out the ‘Film Tent’ which has the capacity of 200 people. Don’t confuse this event with your typical trip to the cinema to catch the next big blockbuster. The Film Tent features an abundance of local and internationally produced independent short films, animations and music videos.

In terms of Art, you will be treated to several art installations of various shapes and sizes all of which will be displayed in the outdoors, a cool alternative to your traditional art gallery. Let’s just hope that it doesn’t rain.

The catering for the festival will most likely get you to go to the gym for the next week subsequent to the festival. Whether you prefer Western or Eastern food, the festival has everything covered from pizza, noodles, soup, pasta and the list goes on. So don’t bother preparing finger food or untoasted ham and cheese sandwiches the night before because you will definitely not need it.

Now onto the line-up for this year. Some of the bands that will be featured includePrimal Scream, Alt-J, Chet Faker, Sneaky Sound System, The Yours, and Noughts and Exes. This is the perfect way to find out about new music and new bands, so don’t miss out this exciting opportunity to memorize lyrics and repeat them over in your head and google them when you get home!

Tickets can be purchased from October 10^th onwards (details below) at all HMV stores. The festival will take place from Saturday 1^st December to Sunday 2^nd December at the West Kowloon Cultural District

Advanced tickets:
Adult Weekend: HKD590 (limited availability)
Adult Saturday/Sunday: HKD390
Student* Weekend: HKD490 (limited availability)
Student* Saturday/Sunday: HKD290
On the door tickets (subject to availability):

Adult Saturday/Sunday: HKD490
Student* Saturday/Sunday: HKD390

FREE ENTRY for children under 12 and accompanied by an Adult.
*Students are those in full time education in Hong Kong. Valid student ID must be shown upon entry.

Visit the official at http://www.clockenflap.com for more information about the festival

What Are Your Hobbies/Interests?

When somebody asks me this question, all information stored in my brain seems to flush away as they stare at the blank expression on my face and utter the enthusiastic sound effect of “uhh….” Talk about being put on the spot, there are obviously so many to choose from, I can’t decide what to tell you first. Internet, music, and food – because is there anything in life that is more important at a young age without getting into ‘real-people’ challenges such as jobs, housing, investments and everything else your parents constantly remind you about? So forgive me when someone much older than me, and by much older than me I mean someone at least twice my age, asks me what I like and I cant be bothered to think of a proper answer that is longer than a couple of words. This also applies to relatives and other random aunts and uncles I didn’t know existed until a family reunion.

I probably will be less inclined to give you an answer when I feel that you are just prodding into my extremely uninteresting life because even if and when I do tell you what I think my interests/hobbies are, you will either go “oh right” and nod exaggeratingly or ask endless questions that will make me feel like I am being interviewed. Perhaps it’s partially to do with the fact that I don’t like talking about myself and that I prefer to be left alone on certain occasions such as family reunions where it can either be really fun or just super awkward, usually the latter drawing from personal experiences.

I also feel like I am an incredibly boring in comparison to some people. Okay, a lot of people. They list all their achievements in life and I’m thinking “man, I’m starving, I wonder whats for dinner tonight” or if being realistic “oh crud, my life is worthless in comparison to theirs. I have accomplished nothing as big as they have. Just smile and laugh along with everybody else and look like you are somewhat engaged in what they have to talk about”. Hard not to compare yourself with everyone else but when they say that they climbed a mountain or have some bizarre hobby when I said that I enjoy watching tv shows on my computer, I feel that I may have to re-think a lot of things and then go watch tv shows on my computer to feel less bad about myself.

Sometimes we don’t realize our own achievements and while we feel like we have accomplished next to nothing, we actually have. It just feels like everybody else has generic interests and achievements so there is no need to state what they are. Graduating from university, playing a certain instrument, travel, sports, tv/movies and so on. We don’t want to get into too much detail because you just know you will be asked questions you have already previously answered to about ten different people and have to re-tell stories and experiences when all you want to do is be on the internet, listening to music and chomping on food.

No-one Ever Really Dies

Calling all funky party animals people who can fistpump the night away, party till dawn and attend after after parties…or just general music fans, N*E*R*D will be keeping the crowd on their feet as they play their tunes at PLAY, one of the many hubs of Hong Kong’s nightlife on Thursday November 1^st 2012 at. Who cares if it is on a Thursday? Turn up to work with a headache because nobody works hard on a Friday anyway.

The trio have established themselves in the music industry and are known for their electronic sounds and the fusion of funk, hip-hop and R&B elements. The featured the hit single “She Wants to Move” in their second album “Fly or Die” appeared at the top of the charts in various countries and can be considered as one of their most popular tracks.  The band then went on a hiatus but came back with their third album in 2008 and toured with prominent artists such as Kanye West, Rihanna, Lupe Fiasco and Gorillaz.

Fancy a break from the working week? Catch N*E*R*D at Play, 14 Wyndham Street, Central, Hong Kong from 11pm onwards.

Visit their official website at: http://n-e-r-d.com/

Forever Alone with Cats = Single

I’m not really sure that perks is the right word, but on many occasions being single can certainly has it’s perks even though they can be for the smallest, pettiest thing in life.

1. You don’t have to worry about ‘stepping on egg shells’. By that I mean you don’t worry about having to say things that might unintentionally upset your significant other. Perhaps you didn’t call each other ‘babe’ enough times during the day or that you didn’t put kisses or a smiley face at the end of your texts.

2. If you’re naturally a roll out of bed person and can’t be bothered to even get out of your pj’s, you might as well forget about personal hygiene, to some extent. Shaving, brushing your hair and what not. You don’t have to try and look good for another person.

3. You can do whatever, whenever. This is a bit of a generalization as some people just understand the meaning of ‘personal space’ and don’t have to constantly be in each others business 24/7…and then there are the ones who constantly text and call. I’m not saying it’s a bad thing, it all depends on the person, but being able to do something and not having to double check and second guess your actions can be quite stress-free.

4. You actually have more time for friends. Again, another generalization but some people do tend to forget friends exist when they enter a relationship. You suddenly free up 12 days (anniversaries), valentines, birthdays, other special gatherings and traditions that you both have. That number can probably total a month when added together. What to do with all that time?

5. For once, you can do what your parents tell you to do such as “focus on studying/getting a job/whatever else they nag you about” because according to them, relationships can be a distraction, and unfortunately, they can be right.

6. You can be as cynical and negative as you want about how unrealistic rom-coms are because they never happen that way in real life. If only it were possible to meet someone and they be interested in you and hop into your bed in the span of minutes. I guess you could also call those “one-night stands”.

7. If you are the independent type and feel like you don’t need anyone and probably a commitment phobe, you can, in fact sleep around. This obviously might not suit everyone who is single as they are ‘waiting for the right person’ but in the mean time, no strings are attached and there are many good-looking singletons out there that simply want to release their sexual frustrations for a night.

8. You can sulk about the fact that you are going to die an old lady/man or grow old with about thirty cats in your home and your friends totally accept you for it. They brush it off with the “awww, don’t say that, you’ll find someone”. So go ahead, feel sorry for yourself.

9. Get experimental. Do you really like boys/girls? Maybe the thought was lingering at the back of your mind for a while, or perhaps you are just curious, which in reality just pisses everyone off in the LBGT community because of your damn missed signals and possible signs of some rainbow lovin’. However, it can also make you realize certain things about your gender preferences.

10.  It’s the middle of winter and instead of having to just share the blankets, you get to have your blanket to yourself. You can pull it over yourself and curl into fetal position, you can roll yourself in it and do whatever you like. The point is, you don’t have to worry about another person grunting in the middle of the night or getting an earful in the morning because an arm/foot/back/entire body is exposed to the cold.

11. On the topic of sleep, you don’t have to worry about snoring, especially if your partner does it. And even if you are the snorer in the relationship, nobody will be there to hear you anyway.

12.  You don’t have to worry about making huge decisions such as moving out, job opportunities and education without having to hurt the other person because they have conflicting ideas or that you may have to end up half way around the world and deal with the whole LDR factor.

13. They say ‘sharing is caring’ but there are some things you just want to yourself. Even if it is the smallest thing such as clothes, accessories, books, food and the list goes on. Sometimes you want you put yourself first before anybody else and that’s allowed.

14. Not everyone is in the best financial situation, so a lot of money can actually be saved when you’re single. You can choose where your money goes, especially monthly presents, if you’re into that kind of thing and meals out together.

15. You can avoid the borderline psychotic conversations of how your significant other looked through your phone/facebook comment on a picture/tweet and saw a message that was ‘suspicious’. Being single allows you to flirt with many people at a time and although this can end up being the biggest douche move to do just for a temporary ego boost, it can feel nice at the time to receive attention from a person or seven.

16.  If you do want to go on a night out to celebrate a certain occasion, you don’t have to go through the additional stress of telling who’s going to be there, especially if your ex’s name comes up. While they have every reason to be a little uncomfortable, you can only tell someone so many times that they are your ex for a reason.

17. You don’t have to watch tv shows or movies you don’t want to when you go to their house and you won’t have to inflict the same pain on them when they come over to yours, it’s a win-win situation for everyone.

18.  You don’t have to pretend to like certain or pretend that you enjoy doing a certain activity together when in reality you hate it and you slightly hate them for it as well.

19.  You don’t have to deal with another set of parents. As if your own parents weren’t a handful with all sorts of rules and regulations you don’t really want to be meeting the parents with whom you get a certain ‘off’ vibe from, especially if you know they think that you are not good enough for their child for whatever far-fetched reasons they may have.

20.  Being patient does pay-off in the end. As much as it seems really unfair that everyone around you seems to be settled and content with their girlfriend/boyfriend sometimes it just isn’t worth it to be rush into things. You get to enjoy your own independence and hopefully you will meet someone who is worth your time before you grow old with your cats.